When your heart is broken

Ken is back today, and I’m going to miss listening to my own music all day. But he’s the boss, and doesn’t like me doing it, so I won’t. At least, not when he’s here. I hope he’ll be impressed with my progress on the bank recs, although given that it’s been at the expense of my daily work, maybe not. Still, the recs have to get done. We’re reaching the end of my fiscal year. I’d rather not delay closing the year out because I can’t figure out my recs. He might disagree and I’ll adjust accordingly, but given that our new year starts on November 1, the recs are kind of urgent. 

In other news, last year Calvin set up a shrine for Mom’s urn, on a nice glass stand and decorated. Including Christmas lights he never took down. He decided to turn on the lights last night, cackling about annoying Dad. I could hear Mom going, “Oh, stop teasing Dad!” Dad wasn’t annoyed, of course, but he was confused. I told him that Cal just wanted to make sure the lights still worked, so that we had them for the season. 

And Final Fantasy 4 week is coming up in December, and we’re going to advertise the discord server on the posts on tumblr about it. I’m excited, but I hope my writer’s block has lifted by the time it rolls around. It would be nice to be able to really participate in it like I did last year. I’m already way behind in the Halloween event, and I only have two days of that left, unfortunately. I have plenty of room in my timewarp queue, though, so maybe I’ll figure out what I need to complete my quests and spend the time to timewarp them all. 

Anyway, that’s all she wrote. Gonna go write for a bit before work. 

I’ve been trying to get back into the swing of writing, but I find myself driven to distraction more often than not. I have little to talk about that isn’t blind whining, so there’s that. 

I had a bizarro world experience at work on Friday. Sue brought over details of a check that Ken said wasn’t cashed and therefore a stop put on it, but when she went to reissue it, it was listed as cleared in the system already. So I grabbed my bank rec paperwork, and sure enough, that check had indeed cleared.

For a different amount.

And investigation revealed that different amount was what the physical check was written out for. 

It doesn’t solve the bank rec, but it brings me within dollars. I wonder if there’s another check in that situation. I’ll have to go back over it and compare the register to what cleared, because that’s nuts. Like I said, bizarro world. 

Cal hurt his knee pretty badly on Friday night. I think he dislocated his kneecap, because he was in a ton of pain even in the morning. He bought himself a knee brace that seems to be helping it. It still sucks, but he can walk on it, and therefore I’m not getting him to go to urgent care to get an x-ray. To his credit, he did walk around Home Depot, Spirit Halloween, and Target without having a problem. Maybe he is feeling better. I dunno.

In other news, the accounting department is having its own Halloween contest. We’re not allowed to show up as accountants, so I’m going as an accounting fairy. I’ve got black fairy wings, buckle up fingerless gloves, and purple hairspray. I’ll wear my usual clothes. I won’t be winning the contest but I’ll be appropriately festive. 

Anyway, I feel like there isn’t much else to discuss here, so I’ll wrap it up and move on. I’m going to try to write some. Actually write, not just say I’m going to. Wish me luck.

I just haven’t been in the right frame of mind to write lately. I’m exhausted almost all the time, barely getting through my work day. It might be because of the shorter amount of daylight. It might be because of my liver. I don’t know.

I saw the hepatologist a couple days ago. She’s much more inclined to believe the bloodwork than the fibroscan. There’s a number on the results of the fibroscan that is basically a margin of error. In order for it to be a valid study, that needs to be under 30%. Mine was 28%. So… still a valid study, but only barely. That said, it is still a valid study, and she’s not comfortable hanging her hat on it, so I’m getting a specialized MRI of my liver and a boatload of bloodwork. There are like, 15 tests on that list. She’s gonna check for and rule out everything, because while my AST and ALT levels aren’t alarmingly high, they’ve been elevated for years so something’s going on. 

She also didn’t once mention my weight. In fact, she told me explicitly that she doesn’t want me on the option for liver scarring that causes weight loss because of my medical history. This is the very first doctor who has acknowledged that as someone with a history of gastroparesis, semaglutide could be dangerous for me. 

It’s sad when basic competence is seen as extraordinary.

In other news, I went on my vacation with Calvin. We had a good time, except…

Happier commentary, though, is that we really enjoyed our time in Atlantic City. We went to Hell’s Kitchen, and Cal had a spiritual experience with his food. We both could have done with just the lobster risotto for our meal. It was delicious and it was a generous portion. I had salmon and peas—they got me to eat peas. I hate peas. I did not hate these peas—and a PBJ tart for dessert. Which was delicious, but I wish I had stuck with my original plan (Lemon blueberry cheesecake). 

We also ate at Rainforest Cafe for lunch, and Gordon Ramsay’s Pub for breakfast the next morning. We’ve eaten at all of Ramsay’s establishments now, and we agree that we prefer Steak, hands down. The food isn’t quite as good, but it’s quiet. Hell’s Kitchen was noisy as hell and it was incredibly difficult for me to tolerate. 

Rainforest Cafe was nice, too. We ordered appetizers, got a photo of ourselves, a pint glass, a shotglass, and a giant white tiger for Calvin for Christmas. We also got several other shotglasses, I got a few more presents for Cal, about a pound of jelly beans, and a little purple unicorn. Also a lollypop with the unicorn, but I only care about the unicorn.

Gonna wrap this up now. Ken is off until next Wednesday, but I need to at least pretend to work.